The main components of a wedding have hardly changed with time. A couple surrounded by the ones they love celebrating their union. However, the etiquette behind the big day seems to evolve with every passing year.

With tradition and etiquette being two values held high in Southern society, it’s especially important to get them right for every party, present and outfit surrounding a wedding—not just for engaged couples planning their nuptials but for every guest invited to the big day. But with things changing so rapidly, it’s hard to keep up with the current standards.

To help reduce confusion, local etiquette expert April Setliff of Red Stick Refinement has created a list of dos and don’ts for couples and wedding guests alike. From the wedding party to the invitations to the dress code, she nails down what you need to know for nuptial celebrations in 2024. Read on for her tips and tricks.

The Wedding Party

Engaged Couple

Do: Choose your wedding party and ask them shortly after your engagement so that they have time to organize their calendars, purchase clothing, arrange transportation if they are from out of town and plan any parties that they may want to host. Asking your wedding party is one of the first decisions you should make after your engagement is announced.

Don’t: You don’t have to have the same number of bridesmaids and groomsmen. One groomsman can easily escort two bridesmaids.

Wedding Party

Don’t: Avoid scattering off somewhere, whatever the reason, once you get to the reception. Your job is not over after the ceremony. It’s best to be present and mingle with guests while waiting for the bride and groom to arrive.

The Dress Code

Engaged Couple

Do: Because bridesmaids generally pay for their own dresses, the bride should carefully consider the cost of her bridesmaids’ outfits. It is also important to think about your bridesmaids’ height, figures and coloring, and look for styles that will be as flattering as possible for everyone.

Wedding Guest

Don’t: My rule of thumb is whatever color or style of clothing you choose to wear should not distract from the bride’s gown.

The Invitation

Engaged Couple

Do: Wedding invitations are usually mailed six to eight weeks before the wedding date. To place your invitation order in time, count backward from your mailing date. Also, consider the added printing time for details like engraving, calligraphy and more.

Tip: Ask your invitation supplier for the envelopes ahead of time so that you, or a calligrapher, can start addressing them.

Wedding Guest

Do: RSVP in a timely manner.

Don’t: Bring a guest or children unless it says they are invited on the invitation.

The Registry

Engaged Couple

Do: Register as a couple. These days, many grooms play an active role in selecting items for the registry. Try to register for items in various price ranges. Also, always write a handwritten thank you note within a responsible amount of time, usually within three months of receiving the gift.

Don’t: Expect your guests to select a gift from your registry. It’s a guest’s prerogative to choose your gift. Also, don’t state where you are registered on the wedding invitation. Save this for the shower invitation. Although it may seem practical to include the registry information on the wedding invitation, it may offend recipients as the emphasis would be on gifts instead of the wedding itself.